Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Unruly child


Virtually no parent who has not at some point faced with resistance from your child when he asked him to listen to something. Adults often do not understand why they are opposed to children, because from their point of view there is nothing more natural than that they follow the orders of those who prefer them and thus bring up.But, judging by the nature of the child's disobedience to be small creatures that grow up ... 

The first "no" mothers and fathers will hear before the second birthday of their children. But for very young children to reject often not really: for example, say "no" before you give them food that is eaten at the same time. "No," and "that" babies are fast replacing them as a class action class a lot of fun do not, so it is inevitable to go through the crisis, anger and resistance - that they need to be adults.

Already at the age of three years, "no" and "I" has a function to highlight the child's right to his "self". Parents of children in this age often face a "stormy" episodes of their resentment in various situations that are nothing but children need to confirm their identity, and to achieve through the opposing will of an adult. However, after this period the child has already achieved a certain maturity that allows him to feel little need to work together with adults, and is therefore able to show good will to make something of him. Later in childhood, when you listen, there is something more important - the awareness of the effort that has brought satisfaction for a job well done.

Here is an explanation for parents whose children want to listen to and where they are wrong whose children are "systematic" disobedient. Contrary to popular belief, parents whose children respect their authority, in fact, are not particularly demanding. They do not need to constantly "breathing child by the neck" and tell him what to do. They are calm and strong personalities that respect a child, and thus know how to do that and it respects them. In addition, they are natural because they are very aware that children invariably feel if someone treated them according to the histrionic manner.

On the other hand, often undermining parental authority following reasons:

- "Mechanical" atmosphere in the family - for which the child feels like an object. Disobedience in this case has a function to draw the attention of parents to child. So, if you turn over the duties you perform at home, it will feel noticed and important and it will be "intolerable." What it is not wanted, only wanted not to disconnect from what you are doing.

- Prezazuzeta mother. In a situation where the mother is long absent from home, going to a child on her back just will not cooperate. Then you need to mama preveziÄ‘e ​​their discontent and show understanding for the child's condition and his behavior will return to normal levels.

- Disagreement parents. A very disobedient children, in fact, react to their behavior in the environment they are growing up. Its resistance, it actually shows the inner turmoil because of difficulties with their parents. Because children need to explain what is happening in the family, and if you are unable to resolve the problem yourself, consult a professional.

- Show the parents as "victims" of the child's disobedience. Once grown in the absence of other solutions, reach for the gun and show your child how much they crushed their disobedience. However, the result of this maneuver is that it turns against you, because no one appreciates "the broken guitar", and certainly not the one whom you should make in life. It is much better to face the child with negative consequences that will have a procedure itself, rather than force him to some adults seem to love.

And finally ... It is important to remember that you children will listen to you if you just raise them a lot of freedom and let me be who they are, and who are generally disobedient ask you just to help them, to love and understand.

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