When children do not listen ...

Parents are often faced with a child "no" or "I". Many children do not even pronounce the word, but simply ignore what the parent says. It can be very cute when they were still quite small but can become a problem when rearing small increase.

True, it is positive when children can identify what they want and what is not, and to respond, but "I" can be used to start and when it is not desirable. Here's how parents can respond to rejection or ignoring of the children.

- Be clear and consistent in your expectations. Communicate clearly, get the attention of a child and always, when you talk, watch a child in his eyes.

- Think about how you communicate with your child or partner. If the parents often answer "no" or "I" is very likely to adopt a child and such a mode of communication. Do not expect the child is not what you expect of yourself, because children are always watching us and emulate.

- Try to express their demands in other words. Consider some common phrases that regularly get the answer "I will not." Instead, "We go into the bath, it's time for swimming," try asking, "Would you like to go swimming now or after the cartoons?"

- Be patient. Let your child know that you are on his side. Try not to be rushed and that they often get angry at the refusal.

- Set realistic goals. Children aged four or five years should be established borders, so they feel protected and safe. We also have the right to say "no" if you think that something really can not do. Think about their age and what they are physically, mentally and emotionally capable.

- Have the rules is fine, but do not have them too. Talk with your child and explain the basic rules of behavior at home and in your relationship. Explain the consequences.

- Reward good behavior. It may not be tangible rewards, you can play with your child, read his favorite story or just a hug.

Be positive. Imagine a video camera that follows you all day. If we view the clip, as they counted as positive and negative comments that you have placed your child?

- A child sometimes needs a space for reflection. This is not punishment, simply move away to another room (which feel comfortable) to reflect on his behavior, but only after explaining to him why you are doing. Sometimes you can send yourself to time out.

- Encourage and empower children. Give him a chance to reach its decisions by given a choice whenever possible. Sometimes the pace is too fast for our children, and slow down whenever you can.

- Choose your battles. You can not just impact on every aspect of life of the child, and do not need. In some situations, you simply need to give your child space, such as for example the choice of clothing.

- Always try to avoid situations that will cause problems (where possible), but if you find yourself in this situation, you can also use the method of distraction. Sometimes it is better to focus the child to something other than get into a situation that will cause additional stress for both.

Finally, be patient and consistent with its approach. Remember that your child is a little person who grows and develops in an individual with his attitude. Discipline of course sometimes we have to impose, but it does not mean that we need to completely control the child. In contrast, my kids need to learn how to control himself. 

How to discipline someone else's child?

What if you have been entrusted to the care of someone else's child who is very disobedient

We recently received an interesting mail, namely a reader asked us to help her in the following situation: a neighbor with whom a good relationship, no matter what it is that her neighbors mad at her children and her intrusion into the word when you solve problems with children or interfere in her upbringing.

So we've decided to write something on the subject of discipline other people's children. But to begin to answer a reader - you should not allow others to interfere with your education of children, even if it meant that you will offend the person. If it is your real friend will listen to you and appreciate your comments.

Let us return now to the topic - namely, when I was small and badly behaved, the punishment would come from my parents, and when one of my friends, who was visiting with me or in care, being disobedient, and they were subject to "critique" of my parents. These days however the rules disciplining other people's children has changed. Society is increasingly sensitive to the rights and needs of children, and this is definitely positive, but it should be noted that this leads to many confusing situations. What if you have been entrusted to the care of someone else's child who is a tyrant? What you can do to curb this child?

Our view is that it never comes to excessive interference in someone else's education, if you do this to protect the child. The truth is that none of us wants to offend the parents of that child, but when the behavior of the child (which you at that time entrusted to the care of) dangerous and harmful to himself or other children - you can not just ignore it. But exactly how to react - it depends on the circumstances, and you must take into account the reaction of the parents of that child. So what do you do?

First First, agree with the other parents about appropriate behavior and the possible penalties. Every time you're responsible for someone else's child, always meet with parents and talk to them. Exchange information with them about how the reaction in "crisis" situations. Ask them: "Do you have a special rule that we should keep it?", "What is not allowed?", "How do you respond in these situations?" ... Such a child will get a consistent behavior of adults, and you will know how best to respond in case of problem situations.

Second Immediately specify rules. Explain the rules as soon as they arrive to you, and you can even write them down on paper and paste it somewhere that will see them. So children will immediately know that some things "do not pass."

Third Know limits of punishment. Most parents have no problem with it that their children become familiar with the "game rules" in your house or even punish them in case of disobedience. The problem occurs when using an inappropriate sentence. Here are some general rules: You must never beat him or someone else's child is otherwise physically (or mentally) to threaten. You must not judge him ("You're so bad"). You should not he take his personal belongings. And most importantly (and this is related question for our readers) never discipline someone else's child in front of his parents. No matter what that child is doing, the parent is responsible for their child. What you can do is take the child by the hand and lead him to his parents and repeat your "house rules" in front of their parents - "We have said that the ball is not in the house / throwing toys / square flowers ...".

4th Keep your safety is first. Always react in the event of security breaches - aggression (hitting, biting, shoving ...) or risky behavior (climbing on the balcony, running with a sharp object in his hands ...).

5th Appropriate sentence - react the way you have agreed with the parent of the child. In the case of unforeseen and undisputed circumstances - do this: First, give your child understand that what he was doing was wrong. If it does not stop, make a criticism of the behavior, not criticism of him as a person, but the bad behavior. If that does not bear fruit following the threat of punishment, and finally implementing the sentence. Jelena Vrsaljko, TA psychotherapist at the Center Proventus says is appropriate punishment for a child - that, for example, 6 minutes sitting somewhere alone, or to cancel some of his source of pleasure, such as watching television or playing computer games, or (one day). And another important note, never punish denial of basic needs such as "Today there is no supper for you."

The penalty shall be eligible to be realistic and that can be done. If you threaten your child with something that we can execute, we have achieved nothing, except that our child does not believe that the future threat of punishment will not be effective. And it's very important to be consistent with the implementation of the sentence. Which means that we will subsequently negotiate the length of the sentence, "pardon" and so on.Since parents are often angry at sentencing, it happens to come up too quickly and that the penalty for themselves after a wave of anger that they think is too harsh. So much the better "impose" a more lenient sentence, but very strict and was later relaxed.

6th What if nothing helps? In this case, call parents and explain the situation and ask them for advice if you or talk with a parent does not help - then in consultation with the parents take the child home problematic.

The nature of the child to examine the limits of adults. This is normal. And each child has a bad day sometimes. What is most important in a situation of disciplining other people's children to communicate with the parents of that child to child has consistent rules and thus faster and better to learn socially acceptable behavior and develop social intelligence.

How to recognize sunstroke in children?

How to recognize a sunstroke in children?

Sunstroke can occur quickly, especially if the child is active in the sun, but more often called late sunstroke, which takes place several hours after their stay in the heat - at bedtime or during the first sleep.

One of the most serious problems that can cause the sun is, of course, sunstroke or heat stroke, a severe reaction to the whole body of excessive sun exposure. It can happen quickly, especially if the child is active in the sun, but more often called late sunstroke, which takes place several hours after their stay in the heat - at bedtime or during the first sleep.

Early reaction was very agitated: a child suddenly infirm, felt dizzy and nauseous, often vomit and became drowsy. The larger kids may be upset and headache is almost always present. The child was dewy with sweat, his hands and feet are warm first, and if not removed from the sun, become cold and shivering. Body temperature may be normal, but it is usually elevated. As a child, and the symptoms are less pronounced, a higher risk of complications. When you are just overdone the sun, can lead to loss of consciousness, which often occurs in adolescents.

When it occurs "late" sunstroke symptoms appear slower, less pronounced, but last longer. Children are hot, flushed, although not in the sun. They look as if they were "breaking virus", so the moms and dads often get confused thinking it's the infection. The children are very irritable - crying, seemingly without reason, a larger children usually have nausea (sometimes vomiting), changing the mood and have insomnia.Body temperature is usually elevated.

What in the case of sunstroke can parents do?

-Remove the child from the sun: If it is early and the turbulent sunglasses, a child must first remove it from the sun, if it is possible to go in air conditioned room, or at least in the dark, well-ventilated room or apartment.

-Take a shower the child with lukewarm water: Then let it dry without wiping

-Give him to drink fluids. Chilled non-alcoholic beverage (tea, juice or plain water) is in dire need of a child who has sunstroke. The liquid should not be given at once in large amounts, but more often by smaller, especially if the child is returned. Even as the first drink "portion" of water should be undressed and refrigerate.

-Give him a remedy: If the body temperature remains high, children should be given some medication to bring down the temperature (antipyretic). It is best to put a suppository (paracetamol) in the butt, because the effect is faster and avoids the possibility of vomiting. Of course it is wrong to give any medication in syrup (ibuprofen or paracetamol).

-He needs a home: The next few hours the child should rest, ideally, to sleep. Some parents are afraid to let the little ones to sleep when you have sunstroke. This fear is unjustified, because he really needed a vacation, a dream vacation is the best. Of course, during sleep, body temperature should be controlled, even in the case of new drug therapy to repeat rebounds against high temperatures. After four hours of previous dose can be repeated drug. And if less time has passed, repeat the shower with lukewarm water.

When to contact a physician?

-If the body temperature falls, despite the cooling and drugs. And probably not just sunglasses, but the child at the beginning of another disease. Usually it is the beginning of intestinal infection, or inflammation of the respiratory organs. In this case, quickly appeared, and other symptoms, so you should consult your doctor and ask the right diagnosis.

-If a child loses consciousness and does not recover quickly after placement in the supine position. Loss of consciousness is usually the result of transient hypotension and a lack of blood flow to the brain. This is a harmless variant and almost immediately passes the child lie down and raise his legs, in order to provide enough blood to the brain. However, if the child is then confused, drowsy and poorly interacts with the environment should occur a doctor, preferably a pediatrician.

-If persistent vomiting and all the weaker. Then it is a very serious form of sunstroke and needed medical inspection. He will determine if it is only a sunstroke, or potkrao beginning of another disease (eg summer infection by viruses or bacteria).